Thursday, 5 May 2016


Recently I was looking at myself in the mirror and I just felt a surge of frustration when I sat and analyzed my skin. Needless to say, the overall picture didn't look very pretty: Talk about large pores, break outs on the my chin,  an oily T-zone area and a uneven skin tone! 'Damn,' I thought. What the heck is going on with my skin? I know I always had these issues but lately it felt just all too much and completely over-whelmed me and pretty much knocked my self-esteem !

This wasn't new to me though. I've seen this a thousand times before. Mostly in my teenage years. There were many times that I didn't even want to head out the door, call it normal teenage insecurities but it really got me down. I remember the feeling after my and Nur's road trip. That familiar feeling of despair and total embarrassment similar to what I felt when I was a teenager suffering from mild acne. 

Later, I sort of became obsessed with skin. So much so, that whenever I would meet someone new. Their skin would be the first thing I'd analyze: Particulaly at how flawless it looked. So much so that I'll find a way to adroitly make SKIN CARE a topic. I think I did this to maybe stop their eyes from wandering over my large pores and also to make them aware that   " yeah I have bad skin" so let me just put it out there in case you wondering if I know Kinda feeling . But mostly, I'd want to know what their secret was to amazing skin. I mean, what were they doing that I wasn't??
To clear the air:I don't have ACNE acne but I do have a TON of imperfections that seems better when it's covered with expensive pore clogging make-up. I guess it became so bad that I just couldn't leave home without piling on the make up. And on every other occasion I noticed it was getting more and more thicker and even THIS I did not like! Critics would say that I am being too hard on myself (maybe I am) but I am a really observant person and I know when to admit when I am wrong or when something calls for some reflection time.

 I'd always joke to Nur and Friends -' time to put my face on.' But I became a little worried when make up became my face. I mean sure, I've heard it before, that 'make-up should enhance your beauty and not become it.' Being a blogger and at times in the spot light I feel as if it was so important for me to have perfect skin the way others do. And to fit the blogger norm of 'perfect skin'. I later did some more reflections and noted that bloggers are actually real people who were going through normal things.

 I turned to rant about my story on the ONE platform where stories are widely watched by a large audience - Snap Chat! I love Snap, not only because your story gets deleted after a few hours but also you get to see the people behind their blogging persona's. And that's what I did. I needed people to see what I was really going through with regards to my skin. And although some would admit that social media is never a good place to divulge ones feelings, I felt that it was the perfect forum. So much so, that the love, support and advice I got from you who follow me on Snap have reached out and given me awesome advice and most importantly hope that I am not alone in this! Thank you!

As for blogging and my look posts, It's all make-up guys and really good editing and photography.Zeenat and Miskaa edit my pictures and I always ensure- before posting that my skin looks dewy and flawless- when beneath its actually suffering.  I love make up but when it begins to take hold of me and my ultimate beauty or the ability to look beautiful naturally then I have to take another step.And that's what I hope to do from now on wards. In the hopes that I can inspire those young girls who are often left feeling frustrated after looking in the mirror. You're not alone. 

Until next time!